Stressed Out? Get Rid of Your Stress Boxes.

Last year I was working with a teenage girl in a psychiatric hospital.  She had been there for approximately two weeks and had received notice of her upcoming discharge the following day.  She said in a group therapy that she was stressed about going back to school the next day.  For a brief moment I found myself envisioning her school---the classrooms, hallways, offices, etc.  Every where I looked I imagined boxes piled high.  On each of the boxes was written "S-T-R-E-S-S".    I then shared my vision with this young patient and asked her if that was what her school was like to which she emphatically replied, "No!"  She looked quite perplexed by my portrayal of her school.  I then asked her,  "Well, then, where is the stress?"  While she continued to be confused by my question another patient in the group blurted out, "It's in her head!"  Yes, exactly!  It is in her head!  I asked the patients in the group if there were students at this girl's school who were looking forward to going to school the next day.  They responded, "Yes."  I asked if there were some who were indifferent about going to school the next day.  They responded again, "Yes."  The reason they feel the way they do has very little to do with the school environment and almost everything to do with what the students are choosing to think. 

I then taught these teens a very important principle we all need to understand. Stress is not a tangible entity that exists anywhere in the world. No place, be it school, office, store, church, home, or any other place has inherent stress (or boxes of stress).  No set of circumstances in any of these places has inherent stress.  Stress is a product of the thoughts we choose.  If we are experiencing stress we need to examine our thoughts and determine if our thoughts are rational or irrational.  I have found people often create "boxes of stress" in their lives that they need to discard.  Yes, we may need to study for an Algebra test or finish a PowerPoint presentation for work but that has no power to stress us beyond our capacity to function.  What stresses us is the thought that "I'm going to flunk my test and flunk out of school" or "I'm going to embarrass myself with this power point and get fired."  Mark Twain once said,  "I've had a lot of worries in life, most of which never happened."  Why don't you try this week to unload some of your boxes of stress and see how much lighter you feel.